Denizen
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What are you talking about? Are you talking about writing a story for her? Don't do that.
What are you talking about? Are you talking about writing a story for her? Don't do that.
Oh no, not that character. Just an anchor-wielding character in general.
Hilariously, this a similar concept as to what my character Ash's story is going to be.Arylia must now find a way to remove that beast from her body and expose it to the world to clear her name and prove her innocence, and the only possible option is a wish from the skull heart. Removing it physically would result in destroying both her and the parasite, so surgery isn't an option. But in order to do it, she must pretend to be its ally and pretend to be its friend to persuade it to aid her quest for the Heart, and then finally betray and get rid of it when its over, exposing it to the world as the real criminal: By wishing to be physically separated from it without killing herself.
3. Caleb likes Rock N Roll but Balec likes Techno & 8-Bit? Even though Techno instruments aren't supposed to exist in the SG canon, that sounds like it should be the other way around in my view even if they did, Rock music can be very wild, especially Metal . Just look at the people who do the Flaming Horns sign!
4. The parents spent a fortune and put themselves in poverty just to save 2 fetuses from fatal defects? Not only does that sound extreme and unlikely, but if the docs failed to save them, shouldn't they have to give a refund to the parents for the failed experiments? I don't know anyone who would spend that much just to save a fatally defective kid, its just not worth it.
6. I'll be honest, I like the way u think and I thought you came up with a great idea, but that very idea happens to be very similar to one that I, myself already made (although its not complete, and our two versions still have a good # of differences); even if you did make it two years ago. Nothing wrong with it, but I still found it worth nothing. This part kinda bored me a little bit when reading your post, since I felt like I was reading something similar to what I am doing. The only person who'll be bothered by this is me though.
7. You said their parents sheltered them from the outside world, and then you said the brothers act kindly/rudely to people? I probably missed a part, but since when were they let out? If people know a multiple-being exists, shouldn't that draw at least some attention to the secret lab who did something so immoral to them to them? I'm certain that at least some people should think 3 kids in one is very weird.
8. A music-based combatant? Like #6, there is really nothing wrong with this and this just something I note, but the real game already has 2 music-based fighters named Big Band and Squigly, and the way you describe the brothers makes it sound like they would at least somewhat play like them; but with psychic power.
10. The parents were near poverty... yet they made a profit playing instruments to pay off the medical stuff (even though they already had someone take care of their sons). If they're almost broke, how the hell would they even get any instruments with so little money? Were the instruments poop from a Magic Floating Burrito? Did they luckily just win some raffle for an instrument? Or did someone just give it to them for no apparent reason?
11. An Akuma Glass Cannon? But everyone in Skullgirls has the exact same amount of Vitality and varies whether they're on a team or alone. Maybe I take back what I said about him being OP, sounds too frai to even last longer than 15 seconds in battle, especially if on a team of 3 with the least amount of health.
12. Personally my biggest issue: There are absolutely no references to the Skullgirls Universe at all. No mention of interactions with existing SG characters, no involvement with organizations like ASG or the Medici Mafia, no motives on what they are to do now, or even a reason why they are even fighting. Why are these kids even fighting hot (and not-so hot) chicks in the first place? Is Balec just bullying them out of Sadism? Are they fighting for fun? Do they have a bone to pick with the Medicis? Do they want the Skullheart (even if they can't use it themselves due to being boys)?
Generally, this has doesn't seem to have anything to do with Skullgirls at all and lacks even one mention to its story. So unless you're not finished with ur story and you are willing to keep working on it even after 2 years, I think ur story coulda been a lot better if you made it standalone or for another game/universe. Admittedly, one of my characters has been criticized for the exact same thing and I got into an argument about it (only for me to Ignore the Person and shut him up for good), but I just barely started making mine and it was even near complete when that happened, and its still incomplete to this day and I have yet to finish the rest of the story. Not a bad story u maid, but doesn't sound much like SG.
A normal one would be the safe route, considering living weapon and missing limb weapon are taken already, but that's just my view.It really isn't all that important either way, it's just his opinion put in an easy-to-understand format.
Being that I've been pondering on the anchor character for a while now, I have a question. Would it be the most interesting if a character was wielding a living weapon anchor, a completely normal anchor or had an anchor as a replacement for a missing limb?
Nifty concept. But from what I can tell, she can regrow limbs almost instantly. I personally find that a little wonky. A salamander CAN regrow limbs, but it takes weeks or months. I suppose that they could regrow faster, but there should probably be a good reason for it other than just, "She's a Salamander." Other than that, it's a pretty cool concept!A strong-willed swordsman, this salamander feral will do anything to protect those she loves!
History
A battle hardened warrior has served for many years under the xxxxx family to who she owes her life. She is currently protecting the future heir xxxxx as she searches for an ancient artifact. Although she seems could and disinterested, she's kind and always willing to share her wisdom with others.
Playstyle
Blastema's willing to sacrifice everything for the xxxxxs and her fighting style displays this. With her increased regeneration she cuts off her own limbs to attack, grab and stun her enemies. She's even able to regrow her limbs into more monstrous forms
The idea of her losing her family because the mob didn't want any competition makes sense and seems like a good set up for a back story. Though, I have to wonder. Does she have any combat ability? I ask because if she's going after the Skullheart, she should know that she'd have to face the Skullgirl. If that were the case she'd have to be either very confident in herself or extremely desperate. Though, being young, I guess she could just be blindly naive, expecting the Skullheart to just be sitting around for the taking. Maybe she doesn't even know about the Skullgirl? It's not a bad story, just needs a little more information/clarification/characterization.View attachment 2839
Before you go all "remember Juju?" or "You know it'll never be in the game" or just some random BS related to those, yes, I know, I know she'll never be in the game. So for the love of god, nothing of the sort PLEASE!
Anyways:
She has her own little story in the SG world so I guess it's SG related, lol. And offending it shouldn't be at all.
The character in question's name is Mallis and she's an 11 year old fox (before you say anything, I saw the NPC fox in one of the stages so don't be saying it's OOC for SG, lol) girl who's parents were an up and coming crime couple, so to speak. Unfortunatly, the other mob families decided to put them down before they got too big.
Mallis was able to survive by her parents hiding her in a trash can in thier house before they were ruthlessly cut down. Mallis, now alone and afraid, wandered the streets for weeks, with orphanages refusing her due to her past ties with crime life. She scrounged for any form of money to get food to survive, being as she didn't want to resort to theft. The other mobs knew she survived but considered her no threat so they pretty much ignored her. Mallis catches wind one day of the skullheart and now seeks it to bring back her family.
There's more but this is the basic synopsis.
Thank you for making an example of yourself. Now I can demonstrate exactly why I am inclined to loathe self-insert characters.
One of the big offenders with self-insert characters is that they know too much for their own good. They have interactions with everyone, but they're all very typical and predictable, none of them are clever. Luke talks like a generic Skullgirls fan would (Trying to steer Cerebella away from a life of crime, sympathizing with Peacock's past, so on and so forth). This ranges from annoying to diminishing the special dialogue's "specialness" to being Sue-like at times (Knowing about Filia's amnesia and talking to her about it? Come on, man). In addition, coming from outside this universe means they can't take advantage of any of its unique attributes. Filia's got a parasite. Cerebella's got a Living Weapon. Luke has...a couple guns and a sword. Even his portal "gimmick" would be recycling ideas already attributed to Venus. Not exactly thrilling by comparison, eh?
While less offensive than a Mary Sue variant, self-inserts (Literal ones, in this case) are in general boring, shallow, hard to appreciate, and, like the MS variant, used solely for wish fulfillment (I'm looking at you, Aeon/Venus Boss Battle).
But that's a general statement. Luke has further flaws than even this (Namely, why the hell is he immortal?).
allright then, editing some.Thank you for making an example of yourself. Now I can demonstrate exactly why I am inclined to loathe self-insert characters.
One of the big offenders with self-insert characters is that they know too much for their own good. They have interactions with everyone, but they're all very typical and predictable, none of them are clever. Luke talks like a generic Skullgirls fan would (Trying to steer Cerebella away from a life of crime, sympathizing with Peacock's past, so on and so forth). This ranges from annoying to diminishing the special dialogue's "specialness" to being Sue-like at times (Knowing about Filia's amnesia and talking to her about it? Come on, man). In addition, coming from outside this universe means they can't take advantage of any of its unique attributes. Filia's got a parasite. Cerebella's got a Living Weapon. Luke has...a couple guns and a sword. Even his portal "gimmick" would be recycling ideas already attributed to Venus. Not exactly thrilling by comparison, eh?
While less offensive than a Mary Sue variant, self-inserts (Literal ones, in this case) are in general boring, shallow, hard to appreciate, and, like the MS variant, used solely for wish fulfillment (I'm looking at you, Aeon/Venus Boss Battle).
But that's a general statement. Luke has further flaws than even this (Namely, why the hell is he immortal?).
If it were trolling it would have more grammar errors, it'd be much shorter, it'd lack spoiler tags, and it would have a couple "I'M SO AWESOMZ" thrown in.